A Song Inside

This is a story about love.

You are a song inside me now, a melody that stirs and bursts into life when I think of you.’

In this heart-breaking, thought-provoking and ultimately uplifting memoir, she remembers her life with the boy and young man who enchanted and infuriated in equal measure. Sam saw colours where others saw grey. He made people feel alive. His unvanquishable spirit sings out as Gill reflects on the joys he brought, the difficulties of his struggles with schizophrenia, and the impact of his death.

Part journal, part journey into the past, and part conversation with Sam, in this beautifully written memoir Gill thoughtfully and tenderly reveals her relationship with her son, both before and after his death. A Song Inside explores universal issues of love and loss to reveal how we can move forward and find happiness again, without leaving behind the people we have lost .


ISBN: 978-1-8380430-1-8

Published: 22nd July 2020


ISBN: 978-1-8380430-0-1

Published: 22nd July 2020

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About the author

Gill Mann has written for as long as she can remember but has only recently considered publishing her work. She has had a long and varied career, starting her working life as a solicitor and becoming a partner in a law firm.

In her early forties she re-trained as a professional photographer, becoming an Associate of the Royal Photographic Society, before deciding to return to university when she was in her late forties to study for a Post-graduate Diploma and Masters degree in Psychodynamic Counselling. She now works as a therapist.

It is her interest in and understanding of people that informs her writing. She writes mainly from life but has more recently turned to fiction, starting work on a collection of short stories based on the theme of therapy.


“This beautifully written and tender tribute to a beloved son is full of sadness but also of love. I learned a lot from it.” – Cathy Rentzenbrink, writer, journalist and author of the Sunday Times bestselling memoir The Last Act of Love, Twitter: @CatRentzenbrick

“Schizophrenia remains greatly misunderstood. By telling the profoundly personal and deeply moving story of how it changed the life of her son and her family, Gill illuminates the truth of the disease.” – Orlando von Einsiedel, Oscar-winning film director of The White Helmets

“A Song Inside is a tribute to the quiet heroism of motherhood, the celebration of difference, the heartbreak of loss. I loved this book for its unflinching honesty, for its ability to get up close to uncomfortable truths without shying away but most of all, I applauded its exploration of a mother’s relationship with her son – by turns, infuriating, challenging, joyful, painful but always filled with love.” Kerry Fisher, author of The Woman I Was Before, Twitter: @KerryFSwayne

“It is inevitably far from an easy read and often brought me to tears. This is an unsentimental, sensitive and at times raw dissection of living with illness and coping with grief. A Song Inside is both moving and honest; ultimately Gill Mann has written an uplifting love letter to her son, Sam.” – Ali Thurm, author of One Scheme of Happiness, twitter: @AliThurm